No Lions in the Overhead Compartment

I'm sorry sir, that dead giraffe is going to have to fit under the seat in front of you.....

I knew that I wanted to write about something again, but couldn't think of what to write.  I asked the facebook peanut gallery for topics, but got a cool goose egg.  I needed to get something up here, though, because I would feel lazy if I didn't.  

So what would I pick? 

Does the world's internet tubes need another HOT TAKE about Donald Trump?  What about how cunty the American public has become?  Do I really need to talk to you about that?  Or man, maybe you haven't heard about that guy who shot a lion?  l can't be the millionth person to talk about that.  I will need some new story to come out before I waste time talking about that.

Oh, what?  There is a new story?

According to NBC News, a few of our beloved airplane operators have banned the shipment of the dead animals that have been shot by people such as the American dentist.  This is something that they said they were cool with fairly recently.

How does anyone not see right through this, though?  Are we to believe that the executive boards of these companies suddenly became animal rights activists overnight?  Or is this a cheap attempt at good publicity and an opportunity to get the internet activist brigade off their backs?

You probably don't need me to tell you that hunting is a shitty hobby and flying 39843908 miles away just to kill an animal makes you a certified lunatic.  My job here is not to stick up for these people.  

I am putting those feelings aside and grabbing a handful of my patented scorn (available by the pound holiday season 2016) and tossing it American Airlines way.  You might think you got one over on Tony P, but NOPE.  How about y'all just pipe down and fly the planes and don't worry about what the passengers bring back as souvenirs.  

That reminds me, would the first lion carcass be free?  What about for valued platinum, gold and diamond business medallion cardholder members?  

What makes me laugh is that the TSA failed to catch guns something like 95% of the time in a recent test administered by themselves.  Great, now they get to look out for the late Simba too.  

I would rather the airlines focus on bringing their product up to the standard of their foreign com padres, and all of us to hold them to it instead of falling for meaningless gestures such as this one.  If Delta won't do it, someone else will.  It isn't illegal (yet), so back off.  Stay in your lane, bruh.

Besides, a dead animal might smell better than someone the living ones in economy class.